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I realized a while ago that people, who will fill you in on the latest gossip, will also
spread gossip about you. Gossips are gossips and no one escapes their cruel
tongues. I know this because I used to participate in spreading gossip. Participate
is putting it mildly, I used to delight in hearing the latest shame, misery or failure of
another. And my goodness, I could never pass up an opportunity to critique
someone’s wardrobe, hair style, home, boyfriend, etc. and whatever. Makes me
sound like a horrid person, I know. I was.
I never really saw my gossiping as destructive. I saw it as harmless and fun.
Besides everyone does it. I mean the source of the gossip would never know they
were being talked about. It was just another way of socializing with friends.
Friends, whom I can assure you, would be quick to turn you into the next target, as
soon as you left the room. “I can’t believe she’s wearing that!” or “Doesn’t he own a
mirror?!”
One day I witnessed a similar gossiping fest when I was with a group of coworkers. I
noticed how anyone who left the table we were sitting at, suddenly became the next
hot topic. I remember I had to desperately go to the bathroom, but I was afraid to
leave the table and become fodder for their gossip party! It was then that I got to
see my own cruelty in the faces around me. I didn’t like what I saw.
I have a new truth; a refusal to gossip! If someone offers me gossip, I cut them
short and say I’m not interested. If I’m with a group and they begin to rip into
someone, I immediately speak in the absent person’s defense. I will never take part
in a behavior that is not only damaging to the one being talked about, but to all
those that contribute to the gossip as well. It belittles them and exposes their self-
hatred.
spread gossip about you. Gossips are gossips and no one escapes their cruel
tongues. I know this because I used to participate in spreading gossip. Participate
is putting it mildly, I used to delight in hearing the latest shame, misery or failure of
another. And my goodness, I could never pass up an opportunity to critique
someone’s wardrobe, hair style, home, boyfriend, etc. and whatever. Makes me
sound like a horrid person, I know. I was.
I never really saw my gossiping as destructive. I saw it as harmless and fun.
Besides everyone does it. I mean the source of the gossip would never know they
were being talked about. It was just another way of socializing with friends.
Friends, whom I can assure you, would be quick to turn you into the next target, as
soon as you left the room. “I can’t believe she’s wearing that!” or “Doesn’t he own a
mirror?!”
One day I witnessed a similar gossiping fest when I was with a group of coworkers. I
noticed how anyone who left the table we were sitting at, suddenly became the next
hot topic. I remember I had to desperately go to the bathroom, but I was afraid to
leave the table and become fodder for their gossip party! It was then that I got to
see my own cruelty in the faces around me. I didn’t like what I saw.
I have a new truth; a refusal to gossip! If someone offers me gossip, I cut them
short and say I’m not interested. If I’m with a group and they begin to rip into
someone, I immediately speak in the absent person’s defense. I will never take part
in a behavior that is not only damaging to the one being talked about, but to all
those that contribute to the gossip as well. It belittles them and exposes their self-
hatred.
| I Live Gossip Free By Sue .W., CA |
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