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One of the four principles in attracting positive energy is to practice forgiveness. This column is a platform for purging the negative emotions we hold for those who have wronged us. Take back your power, forgive, and move on to a better life and the best you! |
I knew Mary from various PTA functions. She was a great gal, always heading one committee
or other, and totally involved in our elementary school’s activities. Both our boys ended up in
the same class in fifth grade. Mary and I got a chance to truly bond as we got involved in class
projects, field trips and parties. Our boys became fast friends, too.
Getting to know Mary I discovered that both our husbands were in the same industry. But Mary’
s husband happened to be the president of a particular firm that my husband always dreamed
of getting onboard with. As our friendship progressed, our husbands also established a solid
friendship and before long, Mary’s husband, Charlie, offered a wonderful position in his firm to
my husband, Paul.
Once Charlie became Paul’s boss, Mary became mine. I was no longer asked if I could watch
her children, I was simply told. I was also involved in running her errands and even getting
involved in PTA Committees I had no interest in. We were also expected to be socially
committed to whatever plans Mary and Charlie had arranged for us. And even my son had to
be available to play with Mary’s boy. It was awful, but I was caught between a rock and a hard
place. I didn’t want to upset Mary fearing it would affect Paul’s new job. I was in self imposed
slavery.
Well the day came when I inadvertently rocked the boat. My son had previous plans when Mary
called to say she would be dropping her son off. I told her she couldn’t because Jay was going
to another friend’s house. Mary suggested Jay cancel his plans and I said no he would not.
Funny how we will sometimes bend and twist to accommodate others, but when our children
are involved, we develop steel spines.
Mary hung up, after a soft spoken, “Very well.” I felt relieved that she understood that Jay was
free to play with whomever he wanted. I thought maybe some of my shackles were being
loosened. And then the phone rang and my husband was breathlessly recounting what had
just occurred in Charlie’s office when a weeping Mary called to complain about how I had been
rude to her and had rejected their only son. Paul just happened to be sitting in Charlie’s office
and caught a major lecture about how he thought both families were good friends, etc. Paul
told me to do whatever I had to do to make Mary happy.
This was not sitting well with me at all. From the very start this was against my nature.
Kowtowing to a bunch of spoiled brats was not me, but here I was dialing Mary’s number and
apologizing for the misunderstanding – groveling, totally pathetic. And was Mary gracious and
understanding. No, she wanted my face in the dirt. I found myself in tears from the anger I felt
for this ordinary woman, who thought she was somehow superior to me. I sobbed louder with
the thought of what I had subjected my children to for her whims. She thought I was sobbing
for her forgiveness. I was sobbing for my own. Through my heavy gasps for air, I heard Mary
say my pleas were not good enough and she hung up the phone with a slam! I caught my
reflection in the hall mirror, tear stained, bloated face and red nose, to hell with Paul’s job, I had
set myself free!
We no longer socialize with Mary and Charlie. Charlie and Paul managed to maintain some
level of their friendship and their professional relationship, which is still going strong. I remain
the bad person in all of this, but it’s a small price to pay for mine and my son’s freedom. Yes,
company holiday parties and award dinners are a bit awkward, but only for Mary.
I was so angry with Mary, that had she been bleeding in the street, I would have passed her
by. But this has to stop; I will not allow Mary to harm me further by making me carry this awful
hate for her. I really do forgive you Mary.
or other, and totally involved in our elementary school’s activities. Both our boys ended up in
the same class in fifth grade. Mary and I got a chance to truly bond as we got involved in class
projects, field trips and parties. Our boys became fast friends, too.
Getting to know Mary I discovered that both our husbands were in the same industry. But Mary’
s husband happened to be the president of a particular firm that my husband always dreamed
of getting onboard with. As our friendship progressed, our husbands also established a solid
friendship and before long, Mary’s husband, Charlie, offered a wonderful position in his firm to
my husband, Paul.
Once Charlie became Paul’s boss, Mary became mine. I was no longer asked if I could watch
her children, I was simply told. I was also involved in running her errands and even getting
involved in PTA Committees I had no interest in. We were also expected to be socially
committed to whatever plans Mary and Charlie had arranged for us. And even my son had to
be available to play with Mary’s boy. It was awful, but I was caught between a rock and a hard
place. I didn’t want to upset Mary fearing it would affect Paul’s new job. I was in self imposed
slavery.
Well the day came when I inadvertently rocked the boat. My son had previous plans when Mary
called to say she would be dropping her son off. I told her she couldn’t because Jay was going
to another friend’s house. Mary suggested Jay cancel his plans and I said no he would not.
Funny how we will sometimes bend and twist to accommodate others, but when our children
are involved, we develop steel spines.
Mary hung up, after a soft spoken, “Very well.” I felt relieved that she understood that Jay was
free to play with whomever he wanted. I thought maybe some of my shackles were being
loosened. And then the phone rang and my husband was breathlessly recounting what had
just occurred in Charlie’s office when a weeping Mary called to complain about how I had been
rude to her and had rejected their only son. Paul just happened to be sitting in Charlie’s office
and caught a major lecture about how he thought both families were good friends, etc. Paul
told me to do whatever I had to do to make Mary happy.
This was not sitting well with me at all. From the very start this was against my nature.
Kowtowing to a bunch of spoiled brats was not me, but here I was dialing Mary’s number and
apologizing for the misunderstanding – groveling, totally pathetic. And was Mary gracious and
understanding. No, she wanted my face in the dirt. I found myself in tears from the anger I felt
for this ordinary woman, who thought she was somehow superior to me. I sobbed louder with
the thought of what I had subjected my children to for her whims. She thought I was sobbing
for her forgiveness. I was sobbing for my own. Through my heavy gasps for air, I heard Mary
say my pleas were not good enough and she hung up the phone with a slam! I caught my
reflection in the hall mirror, tear stained, bloated face and red nose, to hell with Paul’s job, I had
set myself free!
We no longer socialize with Mary and Charlie. Charlie and Paul managed to maintain some
level of their friendship and their professional relationship, which is still going strong. I remain
the bad person in all of this, but it’s a small price to pay for mine and my son’s freedom. Yes,
company holiday parties and award dinners are a bit awkward, but only for Mary.
I was so angry with Mary, that had she been bleeding in the street, I would have passed her
by. But this has to stop; I will not allow Mary to harm me further by making me carry this awful
hate for her. I really do forgive you Mary.
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